i drank out of a bidet.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
