What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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