you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"