yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
PANTIES FOUND
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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