we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
