i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
This gyro tastes like lonliness
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize