whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
