I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
