I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
