He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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