The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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