She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
