oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
