i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
love makes seman taste better
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Randomize
