You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
