you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
