Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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