would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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