Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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