She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
