blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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