Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I got inside last night via doggy door
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
