I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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