no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
