party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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