Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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