She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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