absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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