If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I feel like abortions should bother me more
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
