Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
My bed smells like the plague
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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