If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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