Texts From Last Night

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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.

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  (814): In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words. http://tfl.nu/vqcb
  Replies (25) Good night (1190) Bad night (2552)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.

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  (217): That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy. http://tfl.nu/e6z7
  Replies (15) Good night (901) Bad night (2612)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker

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  (330): She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker http://tfl.nu/3dfg
  Replies (36) Good night (755) Bad night (5254)
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  (310): View more from California

  I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer

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  (310): I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer http://tfl.nu/kzvv
  Replies (8) Good night (4393) Bad night (626)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao

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  (830): just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao http://tfl.nu/019w
  Replies (17) Good night (3969) Bad night (1056)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  He went soft

  (631): View more from New York

  Wait. During?

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.

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  (260): He went soft (631): Wait. During? (260): Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH. http://tfl.nu/18lb
  Replies (99) Good night (878) Bad night (15883)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America

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  (615): I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America http://tfl.nu/yesg
  Replies (20) Good night (4177) Bad night (881)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.

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  (269): I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon. http://tfl.nu/pf1i
  Replies (6) Good night (2829) Bad night (803)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.

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  (904): pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking. http://tfl.nu/eg7z
  Replies (3) Good night (2140) Bad night (617)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?

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  (770): A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay? http://tfl.nu/s9ck
  Replies (8) Good night (455) Bad night (1431)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen

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  (519): I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen http://tfl.nu/o99g
  Replies (2) Good night (479) Bad night (811)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.

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  (503): Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush. http://tfl.nu/eadi
  Replies (2) Good night (907) Bad night (739)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of

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  (306): my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of http://tfl.nu/jepn
  Replies (4) Good night (592) Bad night (234)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises

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  (617): You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises http://tfl.nu/wnpw
  Replies (1) Good night (662) Bad night (343)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.

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  (406): Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life. http://tfl.nu/a4er
  Replies (0) Good night (254) Bad night (501)

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