moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?