i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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