Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
