My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
