Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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