We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
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I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
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"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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