My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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