my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
