he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
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you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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