Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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