East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
she woke up with a sticky ear
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
