No, you can still breathe under the balls.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
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New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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