I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
