sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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