so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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