ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
