You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
