My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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