Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
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I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
BRING THE BAGELS
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You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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